abby
Issues of identity are serious matter for adoptees, families
Dear Abby: May I weigh in on the letter from “Noah’s Real Dad in New York” (June 27), whose adult adopted son wants to reclaim his original last name? I am an adult adoptee who searched for and found my birth family. I also joined …
Widowed mom’s ugly behavior is sign that she needs help
Dear Abby: I agree with your advice to “Driven Away in Georgia” (May 26), whose widowed mother has become so bitter, all eight of her children avoid her. As a clinical neuropsychologist who works with people with dementia and other aging-related problems, I’d like to …
Pastor without compassion needs a come-to-Jesus talk
Dear Abby: We have a problem — our pastor. He uses the pulpit to criticize, put people down and offers no compassion. A person can only take so much. The problem is, if you say anything to him, you can bet the next sermon will …
Secretly remarried mom still collecting alimony from dad
Dear Abby: My parents divorced 20 years ago. The court approved a mutual agreement that Dad would pay monthly alimony until Mom remarried or one of them died. He has never missed a payment. I have recently discovered that Mom secretly married her live-in boyfriend …
Wedding production begins with an orchestrated proposal
D ear Abby: Has the marriage proposal become an invited ceremony like the wedding, or am I out of touch? A few months ago friends and family were invited to a beach near Seattle for the proposal. Our grandson and his live-in went for a …
Readers running hot and cold on toilet brush in dishwasher
Dear Abby: The letter from “Turned Off in Texas” (May 18) caught my attention. While I agree that putting a toilet brush in the dishwasher with the dishes was unexpected and off-putting — we don’t ever want to link the toilet with our food — …
Fan of Hollywood wonders if romance is just a dream
Dear Abby: I come from a Third World country and live as a legal alien in San Francisco. I grew up reading great American authors, watching American TV and Hollywood movies, so I thought I had a good understanding about your Western societal structure. I …
National anthem deserves your hand and heart
Dear Abby: I was criticized recently for placing my right hand over my heart while the U.S. flag was flown and “The Star-Spangled Banner” was being sung. I was told that the hand over the heart is for the Pledge of Allegiance only, when the …
Was daughter’s closet door opened by college mentor?
Dear Abby: My daughter recently told us she is attracted to women. I feel she has been unduly influenced by her mentor/professor at her college, as she quoted this woman several times when she “came out.” My daughter has always been quiet and shy. She …
Family members run for cover from grandma’s talk marathons
Dear Abby: No one in my family will tell my grandmother the reason they don’t call her is she talks too much. None of us is retired like she is, and our evenings are chaotic enough without a two-hour conversation with her. Relatives ask me …
Woman’s helping hand at work comes across as interference
Dear Abby: It has recently come to my attention that at work I am considered “bossy.” It came as a shock to me. I’m hurt that my co-workers and department manager think of me this way. I know I come on strong sometimes when it …
Church teacher dodging dates should say ‘never on Sunday’
Dear Abby: I am a 48-year-old single male. I teach an adult Sunday school class. Two women who have joined our group have made it plain they would like to have a romantic relationship with me. I’m not sure how to handle this. I’d like …
Near-sighted hostess insists glasses are for her eyes only
Dear Abby: I am severely myopic and can’t see without my prescription eyewear. Yet people continually ask me if they can “borrow” my glasses to read the menu. (I work as a hostess.) Abby, my glasses are not reading glasses; they are my eyes — …
Daughter’s clothing choices should be largely her own
Dear Abby: While I understand “Loose and Baggy in San Francisco’s” (April 23) mother’s wish to get the most out of her daughter’s clothing budget, as one whose career has been studying the social psychology of appearance, I disagree with your response. A girl’s early …
Woman who won’t keep track of time isn’t worth man’s future
Dear Abby: I have been in a seven-year relationship with “Maddy,” which will probably end soon because she can’t seem to stick to any kind of routine. Maddy is in her mid-30s, the youngest in a large family, and grew up without any kind of …
Breadwinner is out of patience with her dysfunctional family
Dear Abby: I’m running out of energy to compassionately relate with all the addicts and mentally ill people in my family. My mother is an alcoholic. My aunt is bipolar and schizophrenic. She is addicted to and abusing prescription painkillers and anti-anxiety medicines. My husband …
