Unplugging from social networks

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Updated: March 10, 2012 8:27AM

Social networking is only the cultural standard in 2012 because we allow it.

That’s why I systematically defriended all 439 of my Facebook friends and deleted most of my pictures and Timeline. Deletion is dull work, but it felt good.

I wanted to prove that we do have a choice. Everyone is so afraid they’ll be socially exiled and unable to function without Facebook. For five years, I was one of those people. Now I live in a world without status updates.

Organizing my contacts was the biggest task. But I enjoy the challenge.

In October, I created a Twitter account to promote my column. As a writer, it’s difficult to entirely unplug from social media. It’s the primary way we get feedback on our work. But I’m just burned out on social media.

Since 2003, I’ve been adding and deleting people on social-networking sites as though they are files. The act dehumanizes those relationships, reducing them from individuals to mere digital commodities.

Further, the technological conveniences offered are no longer worth enduring constantly fluctuating online privacy policies and agreeing to forfeit security of my information.

The introduction of Timeline galvanized me toward Facebook deletion. Timeline is proof that everything we do on Facebook is archived — and opens our entire account history for public perusal.

Participation in “free” social networking reduces our lives to marketing fodder aggressively collected to generate profits for the hosting site — be it Facebook or any other.

Not everyone was supportive of my decision to opt out of Facebook entirely.

The removal of Facebook as a mode of communication was a loss to some. They claimed it has become the only way they conduct their interactions.

But ultimately I made a decision and persevered.

With that, I lost some friends. Yet, some of the most stalwart detractors relented once they saw I wasn’t giving up.

Finally, some considered my decision to be dramatic and annoying. They felt there was something fundamentally wrong about wanting to delete Facebook.

Their reaction is emblematic of the very ethos that Facebook founder and CEO Mark Zuckerberg fantasized about and has now successfully instilled in our culture.

We now live in a digital age where your online presence is so vital that many consider it inextricable from our off-line personalities. They fear it’s “out of Facebook, out of mind.”

I’m here to tell you, that’s not true. Those who care won’t forget you.

Now I’m personally notified of engagements and pregnancies, and invited to birthdays.

People I hadn’t spoken to in months called me upon the hearing the news. New friends sent me their information. And my best friends accepted my decision without incident.

We continue to interact the same amount, in the same ways we always did, proving that we don’t need social media to connect us after all.

Now when a friend contacts me, I appreciate it.

It’s your choice to define the role of social media in your life.

E-mail Amee Bohrer at
ameebohrer@gmail.com.